Social Media- 10 Ways to Conduct God Conscious Networking

By: Ameer Idris and Ameera Rahim

Day in and day out there is someone posting on Facebook, either they are saying their next move in life, their quote of the day or sharing some link that moved them in some kind of way.

Often times you will find people conducting in the worst ways on a social networking site such as Facebook or twitter.  Our last Sundays Sister Circle we talked about how we can allow Facebook to be a place to make our marriages and relationships worse. I often say Facebook is what you make it and alhamdulilah it has been such a blessed experience for me and my family, as we use it to help others and help our selves.

Others make it an outlet to vent their lifes issues, talk about others, and really cause social havoc. Social media should not be used to broadcast marital woes and bash your husband (or anyone else). We have a trust with our spouse and that includes upholding his honor. When we type those words of anger and frustration then click share, we are now telling the whole world about our husbands faults or friends and family, we are showing how we do not respect our husband or others, and thus making the whole family look bad. Now when you have calmed down and everything is back to lovey dovey mode we delete the status message and move on, but those who remember and even responded to what you said about your husband will now look at your husband in a different light and also know what you and your family are going through.

Social media is a tempting way to put it all out there, don't let social media become Shaytan Media in your life. Facebook MySpace etc all have its advantages and you can truly benefit from it, but for those who do not benefit only cause detriment to themselves and family.

10 Ways to conduct yourself on Social Networking


  • Think before you type-  So simple yet so hard, before you share that post about your family or husband, ask yourself to what end? what benefit? and what's the use? Chances are you will find that 9 times out of 10 your post will do more harm than good.
  • Intentions- what do you intend behind what you are saying. If you are posting out of anger and frustration than logout and go make wudu, we seem to be quicker to post than we are quicker to pray about it.
  • For better or for worse- Use social networking for the better. Find those ayats and join those hadith a day groups to increase your iman. Then when you run into a marital bump and you log on to vent, you will have a better reason to login you can go get some Divine inspiration and not Shaytanic suggestions. Recite Surah Nas and ask Allah to protect you from the waswas- whispers of Shaytan
  • The scales- Will our post weigh heavily on our good deeds or our bad deeds.  "A slave (of Allah) may utter a word which pleases Allah without giving it much importance, and because of that Allah will raise him to degrees (of reward): a slave (of Allah) may utter a word (carelessly) which displeases Allah without thinking of its gravity and because of that he will be thrown into the Hell-Fire."-Hadith
  • Islam- Believe it or not but others who may or may not be Muslim tend to look at the way people conduct themselves in Islam and use it make decisions about Islam. How are we making Islam look? How are we making our Muslim brother and sisters look? Our actions are dawah, what we say can be dawah and it effects everyone!
  • WWPMD- What would Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa salaam do? The ayat in the Quran says "You all certianly have in the Messenger of Allah (salallahu alayhi wa salaam) a really good example to follow  (Surah 33-21) Our Prophet salallahu alayhi wa salaam displayed the best of conduct and character in all situations "Say if you do love Allah then follow me Allah will (in turn) love you and forgive your sins" Surah 3-31
  • Trust- We have a trust with our husbands (family and friendships) and that includes  how we treat them on the internet and in person. We are to respect our husbands and others, we do not want to fall in category of backbiting and slander which is a major sin that many to be minor. "O you who believe! Avoid much suspicions, indeed some suspicions are sins. And spy not, neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting). And fear Allâh. Verily, Allâh is the One Who accepts repentance, Most Merciful. (Surah Hujraat 49, Ayat 12)
  • Remember the day of grief and regrets- On a day where you can't take back the words you said, we must remember this day will come and alhamdulilah we have today, make this the day to stop and make a plea to Allah to guide us to the best words and actions
  • Keep good company- even online! Some people enjoy fitnah and will be quick to aid you and support your post that may not be the best post. These people will also spread your troubles amongst others and their intent is to talk about the latest gossip. Surround yourself with beautiful sisters that will remind you of Allah and give you true right and Islamic advice.
  • Duaa- If you feel as though you must vent, it's best to vent in the form of a duaa,  for example "May Allah help our wives or husbands to treat their families better as the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa salaam was the best to his family alayhi salaatullah." or "May Allah help our husbands and wives to _________" because of instead of talking about so and so we should pray for them and ourselves.
Use social media and be socially acceptable in the sight of Allah!

Comments

  1. Another Great Blog post from Traditional Muslimah Homemaker ... when we forget we need reminders & many of us have forgotten, there will be a day of questioning, as to what we did on fb & in the world period ... As Habib Umar Bin Hafiz taught us, everyday is a chest that we put our deeds in; that we will one day have to open IN FRONT OF ALLAH The True Judge, one after the other, in a pure righteous state of mind. Some of our actions we will be horrified of & others we wish we had done much more of .... REALIZE THIS NOW & MAKE THE NECCESSARY ADJUSTMENTS; so when we HAVE TO open those chests, we will be okay as we will have done what was best, each day.

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  2. I normally wouldn't reply to a post like this, just because it's a very heavy (and real) topic, but since you asked, here I am. :)

    I think two main points: "think before you type" and "remember the day of grief and regrets" are very important. As some people might say, "I don't think you truly appreciate the gravity of the situation".

    We all have committed sins at one point or another, but these are often sins against our own selves for which we can readily repent to Allah.

    With social media venting, these types of public humiliation, insults, or backbiting are horrible sins against other people, and those people must forgive us for them. Having the weight of someone else's pain or misery on me is something I would never want.

    As another saying goes, when you stab someone in the back and pull out the knife, the wound is still there, and it will leave a scar (assuming they even survived, of course). May Allah protect us from this evil.

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  3. Mashallah, this hit the nail right on the head...right on point. This is a good reminder that we have to think before we act, and we are responsible for using tools like Facebook, in the best ways.

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  4. I do allow facebook to be my sounding board and criticism of others and things that are going on in the world does happen occasionally. I really try to not allow things to bother me, but when they do bother me to point that I must say something, facebook is the medium. However, my family is where I draw the line. That is not just for facebook, but for phone, email, in person conversations. My husband and my children, good or bad personal info is usually kept within our family. If it is something good that I feel may benefit others such as our homeschooling adventures I may share and it is only the positive stuff. Anything involving just me, I share, I am an open book. I don't hide my messy house, my disorganization, or anything else that I may need work on. If someone wants to have a negative view of me, Alhumdulilah, may Allah be merciful. I value honesty and the ability to be myself above having people think fondly of me. In fact, I may be saving them from committing Shirk. However, everybody in my family are individuals with the right to share what they want. Especially with my oldest daughter, I have started to ask her what is ok with her to put on my blog. Our Rasul was very open with his life, and many cultures around the world are very open and honest people. Americans are more closed and closeted. I think some of the problems with sharing things in your marriage has to do with not giving your spouse 99 excuses and jumping on every little things that goes wrong. There would be nothing negative to share on facebook, if we changed our negative perspective on life. Then once there is really something wrong in your marriage, be wise and go to someone who can really help. If you need a sounding board and you don't want help with it and you don't mind having facebook in your affairs then I wont oppose you on it. I am just a problem solving oriented, I like to see productive results. I just don't trust the value of the "advice" of people on facebook. If I need some help with my marriage I will be going to someone in the community that has been happily married for 50 years, that to me is productive. To each his own, I don't try to dictate others life, but I am pretty vocal on my own.

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